3.)List ten things you are currently sick of.
I am sick of…
1.) Procrastinating. Why do I always feel like I have a ton of things to do and yet when things are quiet enough to focus and do them I don’t want to? So I don’t. And yes. I’m talking about laundry.
And ps if my laundry room looked like this:
I probably still wouldn’t do it, but I’d spend a lot of time admiring it!!
2.) My food lady. So when you run a daycare and you join a food program a lady will pop in every so often to observe you preparing a meal. She will take notes, she will make suggestions, she will ask questions and she will leave. At the end of the month, you get a nice little paycheck partially reimbursing you for the nearly one thousand dollars a month you spend on food.
This all sounds fine and dandy until the lady shows up thirty minutes before breakfast is ready and while you’re running around trying to get kids ready for preschool and greeting parents, food lady is concerned about whether you put pineapples ON the pizza or as a side when you offer it to the children. Give me a break. Then she wants me to know, while I’m scurrying about like a madwoman, that when I serve chicken nuggets, cheese, apple slices, and french fries…that I need to be sure to add in another bread as the breading on the chicken nuggets does not suffice. Yes ma’am. Because the three-year-olds here eat that much and I’d hate for them to be lacking BREAD.
3.) Gluten.
Gluten is kicking my ass. I’ve decided the whole family needs to go gluten-free. I have to get it out of the kitchen. My kids are not healing as well as I’d like them to. Not only that, but the stuff is simply not healthy. I even heard they’re starting to connect some diseases to gluten intolerance. So I’m kicking it out…Pat thinks I’ll last maybe a month. We’ll see…
4.) The lack of quality television programs lately. Is it me or is there nothing on!?! Why can’t they bring Temptation Island back or something?
5.) The guy in the parking lot at Target who I had to stop for as he drove slowly around me, staring at me and when I raised my hand in a simple gesture that said, “Hey, I’m just waiting for you to go Bud so I can buy some tampons and chocolate…”
to which he responded by wildly waving his hands back at me as if to say “DAMN LADY!!! EASY!!!!!! DON’T FREAK OUT…WHOAAAA JUST CALM DOWN YOU CRAZY PMSING SOCCER MOM!”
to which I responded by shaking my head as if to say “Give me a break pal, my gesture was perfectly calm, do I look like a mother of a soccer player you belligerent fool!?!”
I mean seriously. Why are people freaking out? AND WHERE IS MY CHOCOLATE!?!
6.) Run-on sentences.
7.) Packages in the mail that are not for me.
8.) Complaining.
9.) Pressure. Not to be confused with “pressure cookers” which I really don’t have a problem with.
10.) My inability to stay up past midnight without feeling hungover in the morning.