Writer’s Workshop: Who Is This Woman?

4.) Describe a moment when you realized your mom was more than just a mom.

I’ve known her only as the woman with the capability to send me to my room with a finger snap and a point my whole entire life.

I’ve known her only as the woman who was miraculously capable of screaming at me to “GET DOWN THERE AND CLEAN UP THAT ROOM OR YOU’RE GETTING A SPANKING!” one second and then answer the phone with an “Oh Hiiii DIANE!!!” the next second…never losing the glare and the finger point to remind me to get. down. there. and. clean. up. that. room.

Now?

I am that woman.

She listens to me complain about my day and when she calls to check in to see how her sick grandbabies are doing I answer the phone with an “ohhhh they’re grrrrrreat…everything is juuuust fine”, never losing the glare and finger point to remind my kids to get. down. there. and. clean. up. that. room.

She marvels at how in the world I’m able to do it all, as if she’s totally forgotten that she was once this woman too. Although she had six kids to manage as opposed to my measley three.

How did SHE do it?

I can recall brief moments in my life where I realized my Mom was not just a Mom. That she had friends who laughed at her and funny things going on in her brain. I remember moments at parties watching her with family and friends and noticing a carefree-ness about her that was light and refreshing. They looked at her with anticipation and smiles as she told stories and reminisced. She looked easy to talk to and fun and thoughtful. She seemed open minded and level headed and intelligent. Who was this woman? And where were the furrowed brows and motherly smiles I had so grown accustomed to?

When my Dad died I was in second grade, and for just a moment my Mom stumbled. She didn’t have the energy or desire to keep us on our toes. She would let our little squabbles with each other go. She would give us what we wanted for dinner instead of forcing us to eat what she cooked. She didn’t push us to keep our rooms clean or to eat our vegetables or to put our shoes away. She was grieving, she was overwhelmed, and she felt sorry for us.

One day she had had enough. The way she tells the story she couldn’t take anymore of the disarray, she needed her house back, she needed her kids back, and she needed some order to the chaos.

She says she went into mom mode, “who’s mess is this all over the coffee table?? Baby! Get in here and put this stuff away!! And who spilled water on the counter and left it here to dry? Lolo grab a towel and clean this mess up!”

She said after her snap back into reality I stopped what I was doing and just looked up at her with that innocent wide eyed look that only a seven year old would have and in a tone mixed with relief and pleasure I said, “Mom. You’re back!”

That’s the first time I can remember thinking…wait a minute? Mom never let’s us throw pillows at each other. Mom never let’s us stay up this late. Mom never let’s us eat pizza six days in a row. Mom never looks sad like that. Mom never looks like she is right here with us and yet feels so devastatingly far away. Who is this woman? What would have happened to us if she hadn’t snapped back?

And I have to say, my mom is a beautiful friend to her friends. She has taught me to be honest and kind to my own. She has a passionate love for the men she’s married. I model my own marriage after the examples she set before me. She’s hilariously silly and yet organized and in charge. She’s a loyal daughter and sister, but to me…although I love those glimpses of her in that light, I love her best just as a mom. Furrowed brows, motherly smiles and all.

My Mom.

….(How much you want to bet she’s motherly smiling right now as she reads this?? *waving* Hi Mom!!! I love you!! Who’s your favorite now???)….

ps Mom we need a new picture together…I’ve used this one like 343 times on The Blog.

Now it’s your turn!

Choose a prompt, post it on your blog, and come back and sign Mr. Linky. Be sure to sign up with the actual post URL and not just your basic blog URL (click on the title of your post for that URL). For good comment karma try to comment on the three blogs above your name!!

The Prompts:

1.) Interview you mom…questions might include, How has motherhood changed you? What ages were your favorites? Do you miss having having kids in the house? What was the most difficult part of being a mom for you? What was the most rewarding part? etc… I think I’ll ask my Mom if I’m her favorite child and when she dodges the question (again) I’ll scream, “DAMMIT WOMAN! Answer the QUESTION!!” Feel free to steal my idea.

2.) Tell us the story of your birth.

3.) How did you parents choose your name? What does it mean? What would you change your name to if you could?

4.) Describe a moment when you realized your mom was more than just a mom.

5.) Write a poem for your Mama.