Pat nonchalantly asked for my Mother’s Day request at dinner the other night.
“So what do you want for Mother’s Day? You want some alone time? Want me to take the kids out of the house?”
I have to admit I was a little irritated. Why do I have to dictate how my “special” days are supposed to go?
“I don’t care” I said. “Whatever you want to do.”
Aren’t these supposed to be those times where your husband thinks up something on his own? Why can’t he think up anything on his own?
“Really? You don’t want anything in particular? We can do whatever you want!” he said.
Whatever I want.
Doesn’t he know what I want? Diamonds would be nice. A clean house? A blank check to the mall? Can’t he surprise me?
“If you want to be alone we can leave you alone…if you want to do something together we can do something together.”
Why do I have to choose?
And then suddenly it hit me. I can make Pat regret his decision to leave it all up to me by making things as difficult for him as possible.
“It’s up to me huh? Okay. I want to sleep in. I want you to get up with the kids and get them dressed for brunch at my Mom’s house. I don’t want to have to deal with their needs at all while we’re there. I don’t want to change one diaper all day. I want you to put them down for naps and give me cash to go shopping with. When they wake up I want you to take all three kids out for the afternoon and I want you to come back at bed time….with sushi.”
If I’m going to treat myself for Mother’s Day than I’m going to do it right dammit.
seriouslyahomemaker says
You showed him! Actually, that is sooo great that he even asked!!! And then asked again. He rules.
That conversation is actually all I want for mother’s day. ahhhh….
angie
June Freaking Cleaver says
When I said, “Hey, know what I want for Mother’s Day?” – I got, from The Mister, this response: “I don’t care, you’re not my mother. Tell it to your children.”
Harumph. Good luck on your day tomorrow.
Em says
How did you know that is EXACTLY what I want to do tomorrow?!?!
Julie@my5monkeys says
I gave dh my list of wants but its now depending on whether on not we have sick kids. totally understand how you feel ;0 ) …I would love to take a day off from being a mom and hide.
Stacy says
Oh, this is my big pet peeve. Hubby pulls it every.single.year. Just once, plan it yourself. I like your reply, I so should have tried that.
Although I do plan on sleeping in and sitting in my new desk chair or on the comfy couch doing nothing, all.day.long. If one of the kids asks for something, I’m sending them to daddy and not feeling guilty about it!
Justine says
Ha! I’m curious to see just how much he’ll actually do from that list. My friend’s husband asked her if she wanted him to bring her car to get washed for MD. Can you imagine???
Justine :o )
Marcy Able says
I kind of know how you feel. Books are always a sure bet with me, and so the other day my hubby asked me what new book was out that I wanted. Only thing is that my birthday and Mothers Day are always a few days apart so he has to get kind of creative, and think. Hope you have a great day tomorrow!
kelly hoosier says
Long time follower, first time commenter! LOVE this post. Exactly what I would like to say to my husband. Good grief!
greedygrace says
Sounds like a perfect Mother’s Day to me!
Mishelle says
SNORT!! I love it… I really do. Why don’t they just don’t get that telling someone what you want and then not having a BIT of surprise is not fun? Mom’s make a ton of decisions, we don’t need to make another on a day that is supposed to be for us?!?
Emily says
My husband did that today too! He went out shopping & came back empty handing because “he didn’t know what I wanted.” & the one thing I REALLY wanted, he decided he didn’t like that idea. Grrr…
kisatrtle says
mmmmm…..sushi. I like the way you think
Katherine says
Exactly. Why do I have to choose? It’s the same way for our anniversary, Father’s Day, birthdays, Christmas, etc….If I don’t choose, we end up at home, in front of the television, doing nothing.
Via says
I looove the editing on that picture. What did you use?
Also, enjoy your day ;)
Amo says
I have to plan mine, too, although I don’t mind b/c it guarantees that I will get to do what I want. Last year, I even had to tell him that I wanted breakfast in bed. That is pretty pathetic!
Foursons says
My husband asked me too. I hate that! Be creative and take care of the kids. That’s all I ask.
jess mcmaster says
great post! it’s sometimes nice they ask, but also it’d be nice if they could figure it out on their own!
i asked for the exact same thing! :D
jess
amber says
I just hope my husband doesn’t forget this year…
Margo says
I think I’ll print out your response and give it to my husband! Ha, just kidding, but I do think it is wonderful that he asked and pushed for doing just what you want :)
Krysten says
Just read your blog for the first time :) Found it via TomKat (my muse for birthday parties) That day you planned for yourself sounds amazing. Can I come with you? lol
Alex says
Amen sistah! I type this as my husband takes a nap and my baby bashes the keyboard. Can mothers day just be renamed I don’t want to think or be responsible day?
cheri says
i wouldnt want to be a mom on mother’s day. does that make sense?
oh, happy mom’s day :)
Stefany says
LOVE IT!!! I hear ya too. My hubs wanted to know what I wanted to do for Mother’s Day too. Ummm, I want you to make one decision without my holding your damn hand… that is what I want. ;)
KLZ says
HA! Thatta girl!!!
parenting BY dummies says
Sounds like my kinda day. I’m going to work. I suck like that:(
Lori says
Well, at least he asked. It is kind of ironic that it’s called “Mothers Day” when the best way to celebrate is to NOT be a mom for a day. oooh, was that bad? Oh well, Happy Mothers Day!
Mama Zen says
But, will you get it? That’s what I want to know!
Jennifer says
I’m pretty sure they are unable to plan it themselves. And if they tried we would not be happy with what they did.
Amanda says
Sounds Amazing :)
rhonda says
Woo hoo! I hope it goes well!
Amy Mayfield says
My hubs always asks me what I want for any occassion and wants me to go to the trouble of making detailed lists (with pics, links, coupons) and then? NEVER gets me anything on it.
So I’ve started buying myself gifts. This year I went to Saks.
You know what I want for Mother’s Day? To not have to make any decisions. The end.
Karen & Gerard Zemek says
My husband’s really good about this. He usually finds something that has cats on it and gives it to me from our cats (since we don’t have kids). He couldn’t find anything this year though.
Slummy Single Mummy says
Sounds like a fabulous day!
The Having To Decide bit is a chore normally isn’t it? It’s like when my ex used to offer to make dinner and then, just when I thought I’d get a nice sit down, he’d say ‘so, what are we having?’
*bangs head against wall*
Aging Mommy says
Good for you! Can’t wait to hear if you actually got all that your heart desires for Mothers Day, but it is a great wish list :-)
Happy Mothers Day!
Allison @ Alli 'n Son says
Why don’t they know what we want? It baffles me sometimes.
This sounds like the perfect mother’s day. Did it go as planned?
Love the pic, by the way. Did you add the aged look to it?
liz says
My husband is the same way. I told him that he’s lucky I’m so low key about days like this because it’s not skin off his back. That, apparently, made him feel bad, and he went to Kroger, got a bunch of flowers and had my girls present them to me in 2 bunches.
Rachel says
I had the EXACT same conversation with my husband. I like the sushi part – I should have thought of that!! Hope you had a wonderful day!
Merrie says
I actually couldn’t agree with this post more. I’ve had a few Mother’s Days now, and I’ve learned (the hard way) that if I want things to go a certain way, I have to make it happen. It just so happens that this year the house payment took first place over my Mother’s day, so next year I’m going to plan better and make sure we can spend some money doing something fun. I’m glad you spoke up and I hope things went as well as you mapped out. :)
Young Wife says
Ha! My DH doesn’t do surprises either.
Jen says
LMAO! Sounds like you had a nice Mother’s Day, if you got it your way. Happy belated Mother’s Day, Mama Kat!
I feel the same way every year on my birthday when my boyfriend asks what I want to do. Unlike him, I like surprises! I want him to thoughtfully plan a special day for me. I hate making decisions, so my birthday is the one day I don’t want to have to decide! I just want to be spoiled. :-)
suzannah @ so much shouting/laughter says
well, at least he asked. i got up at 5:30 AM in a hotel in philly with my husband, baby, and toddler (to do the race for the cure), and the first person to wish me a happy mother’s day was the guy at the front desk.
and that was about the extend of the mother’s day festivities for the day.
there’s always next year…
dysfunctional mom says
I’m dying to know how your day actually turned out!
The Stephanie says
Amen Sista!!
My husband worked all day and I spent the day (MY DAY) taking care of the kids, my mom, and his mom.
So, in other words, it was just like every other Sunday of the year. Good times were had by all. Except me.