I’m not a cleaner.
My house is not a dump, per se, but it’s certainly not gleaming. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being spotless, my house is average. A five or six. It’s something I have always had nagging guilt over, but continue to not do anything about.
My Mom and my sisters are very tidy and like them, I LOVE a clean house. I love the fresh scent of disinfectant in the air! I love actually seeing my floors and counter tops. I love coming home to a house that doesn’t need immediate attention.
I’ll tell you what I don’t love though, and that’s cleaning.
I’ll come up with every excuse to avoid putting things in their proper places on any kind of consistent basis. The only thing keeping my home in decent condition is the fact that I run a home daycare throughout the main level. Just don’t go upstairs. Running a daycare on the main level means the second level doesn’t get touched.
And how quick I am to blame the unsightly rooms on the fact that the daycare demands so much of my attention. How hard would it be for me to dedicate an hour a day to cleaning upstairs? And what would that hour do for my peace of mind in the long run?
I talked to my Mom about the fact that I never seemed to grow up and learn how to clean like a real mom. You know, like the kind of mom she was. With as many kids as she had, our home still managed to look picked up. How did the cleanliness gene skip me?
And I’ll tell you why my Mom is the best. It’s because every time I doubt myself, she manages to say something brilliant that pulls me out of my guilt-fest. Even though she’s a cleaner and prefers a clean home, she can still get inside my brain and see what it is that makes me tick the way I tick.
“But Kathy you spend so much of your time writing! I don’t do that, your sisters don’t do that…that is something that is unique to you and it’s wonderful!”
And when I guffawed at that and insinuated that blogging is something I often do to help me avoid cleaning she said,
“Look, I love a clean house. I enjoy nesting and making my home beautiful and for some people, that’s just what we do. You choose to spend your time being creative and when you leave this world you will have so many wonderful things left behind. My clean rooms are just clean rooms…they’re not going to follow me from here.”
I love her.
I didn’t want to ruin her wonderful sentiments by mentioning it’s likely I could learn to balance writing and cleaning and complete both tasks on a fairly regular basis.
Nor did I mention that while her clean rooms might not be any kind of legacy for her to leave behind, she does have six kids who sing her high praises.
And furthermore, since I’m the kid who neglects cleaning so that I can write about whatever is on my mind, and in this case, how brilliant I think my Mom is…she’ll actually leave this place with a clean house AND a ton of written testimony to her greatness.
She wins.
In the mean time, I am hereby challenging myself to spend just one more hour a day cleaning an area of my house that does not get the attention it needs.
Make that 45 minutes. An hour seems like a lot, no? 45 minutes is good.
To be honest I could probably get a room clean in 30 minutes or less if I stay focused.
So there! It’s final…30 minutes or less of my time will now be spent cleaning everyday! I’m turning over a new leaf dammit.
Starting tomorrow.
hillary says
30 minutes. You could do a ton in 30 minutes. Hey, why don’t you blog about all you accomplish in your 30 minutes?
I come from a family of six kids too! Shout out to big fams and moms that think we’re awesome :)
Alicia says
Procrastinators unite …. tomorrow!
I know how you feel about cleaning. I love a clean home but I’m not good at getting it clean. I didn’t get that from my mother though, you’re mom rocks. My mom, on the other hand, doesn’t know how to clean to save her life. Maybe that’s why I actually like a clean home. Thankfully, my husband knows how to clean quite well and makes sure I keep on the cleanliness train.
trash says
My mother sounds like yours on the cleaning front. My sister does too. Actually so do my brothers. Bugger! That means I got ALL of the no cleaning genes.
My children are doomed!
Gigi says
I also love a clean house. I don’t even mind the cleaning to get it that way. What I do mind is having certain people come along right behind me to mess it all up.
Karen and Gerard says
I am fortunate that my husband loves to clean so does it all! Even the garbage can under the kitchen sink which I will be posting about tomorrow. I couldn’t believe he actually cleans the garbage can. Anyway, you may want to consider teaching your kids to clean for you–it could give them something to do while you blog!
Snuggle Wasteland says
Keeping my house clean is like bailing water with a leaky bucket. I’m going to cling to my life preserver (aka laptop) and let it sink while I blog away.
Ginny Marie @ Lemon Drop Pie says
15 minutes sounds even better! ;) Moms are the best. My mom was the same way — she was my biggest fan!
Becky @ Accidental Southern Mama says
I am a cluttered, tidy person myself who is married to a neat-nick. I do a 20- minute tidy of the house when the hubby calls to say that he’s on his way home from work. So by the time he gets home it looks like I’ve been slaving away all day cleaning. He’s not fooled though, he knows me too well. He learned early in our marriage not to come home unannounced and to always call first so that I can get my tidy on.
Nicole @ Moments that Define Life says
I love this post. I know I say that A lot about your posts, because I love your writing style but I really LOVE this post for multiple reasons.
#1 I am so with you on the cleaning thing.
#2 I hope I can be like your Mom with my girls….she sounds fabulous and I really want to reach my kids like she reaches you all. You are truly blessed.
#3 I have a friend who is in a tough spot in life, she feels like her other friends (me and one other ) have it all figured out, we have (in her mind) the perfect life – husbands, kids, jobs/professional pursuits etc… And she feels like she can barely keep up with just her job (no kids or husband right now) and my other friend pointed out to her that we all have things that we dedicate our time too, it’s not possible to have it all and she made a comment about my writing versus cleaning….haha. Because my friend’s keep really tidy homes and they both know I have the “average” clean happening in my home. Because I…..well write. And scrapbook. And read. And play with cute babies.
Who needs clean clothes and an organized closet? It’s overrated ;-) Your words are your legacy and something to be proud of!
Erin says
I love a clean house…….I am crazy like that.
Rima says
I think I love your mom.
Yeah, I definitely do.
Tracee says
I guess having a messy house is just a burden that comes with being a creative genius…works for me. Hey, you’ve got three kids, it’s never too early to begin house cleaning lessons. Get the other daycare kids in on it too, you know, life skills training.
S Club Mama says
Your mom is awesome :) I hate cleaning too
Lisa Perry says
One word: FLYLADY!!
Leigh Ann says
Sounds like your mom really knows you, and that’s worth more than any clean house.
I’m with you though! I would give anything to be able to clean my whole house in one day instead of spot cleaning here and there due to the 3 kids under 3. Maybe when they’re older. I try to balance things by what can I do while the kids are up (laundry, some cleaning), and what can I absolutely NOT do when they are around (writing)? So free time is usually dedicated to that.
Your mom sounds precious!
Rachel Cohen says
My house is just like your house, without the daycare! I work full time, and have 3 kids. On the weekends the last thing I want to do is clean, so I clean the level that people see when they come over…the main level. My upstairs is an organizational nightmare!
JulieK says
Do we somehow have the same mom! LOL – mine is exactly like that. House is ALWAYS clean! I invited our family over one night for dinner last minute and my husband said, “but don’t you think you should’ve given her more advance notice so she could have time to clean up.” I gave him a long hard look and said, “Dear, my mother’s house is ALWAYS clean.”
I try to be that way but… I do run to blogging to avoid certain tasks. I think I’m a manic cleaner- I’ll do a TON of cleaning and then NONE! :) Ah… my mom also has kids who sing her praises too and I’ll just have thoughts out in cyberspace.
BUT – aim for 15 minutes a day – you can get a TON done in 15 minutes. Read The Fly Lady’s blog/website she has all these “15 minute” assignments for mom’s like us! LOL :)
Jen says
I have instituted once a month cleaning. So far, it seems to be working.
And a clean house is good but an awesomely written blog post is fabulous.
Jenn says
I seriously could have written this post. I too LOVE a clean house. I love the smell of a Murphy Oil Soaped (is that a word? yes, it is) hardwood floor.
But I suck at keeping up with it. Oh, its surface clean. But please, don’t look too close. On the upside, I think 75% of the population of England has the same mentality – they all think my house is SUPER clean, and that cobwebs are just air filtration systems here. But if I didn’t spend as much time writing – and I’m no where near as prolific as you – I’d prolly have more time for cleaning. (No, that’s a total lie – I’d be reading.)
I love your mom, btw. You’re a lucky girl to get support like that
Beth says
Kat,
My mom dubbed herself, “Mrs. Clean” when I was younger and I had a friend’s mom note that my mom’s garage was so clean you could eat off the floor. The garage floor for crying out loud! Now that’s clean!
I didn’t inherit her clean gene and I often wonder why I can’t fold the fitted sheets the way she does all neat and tidy. She would die if she saw my linen closet.
Anyway, loved this post. Thanks!
Beth
Laura says
I have tried everything to get myself to spend more time cleaning; FlyLady, a calendar cleaning system, etc. But, like you, cleaning is not my “thing”. My mother, she is a clean freak. Growing up our house was always clear of clutter and dust, and I always loved bringing my friends to my house knowing that it looked so nice. BUT there were a lot of things I was not allowed as a child; like hanging posters on my walls, eating popcorn on the couch with friends, and the like.
Those things ARE allowed in my house. And that means it’s not as clean. But that also means my kids have more freedom.
Jessica says
I’m so there with you. I LOVE a clean house and I’m totally jealous of those moms who have the same # of kids as me…yet their house is clean. At first, I try to say that they must have maids. Then, I blame it on their “inactive” children who don’t make messes like mine do… Then, I blame it on the 70’s tile in our bathroom and make a point to say how much harder that is to keep clean than the ceramic in their bathroom..I’ve got every excuse in the book. The truth? Instead of doing the dishes, I was blogging. Or reading a blog. Or reading about how to make a better blog. Or blogging about time management. Or tweeting. Or tweeting about my blog about time management. Or editing pictures…for my blog. Or redesigning my header for the 15th time..that week. Certainly I will get to the dishes when I get done with all of that! (Or we run out of plates, lol). Great post. You’re not alone :)
Jayme (The Random Blogette) says
This is so me! I don’t have a spotlessly clean house. There may be dog hair everywhere and clutter all over the counters but my house isn’t a dump either. My mother-in-law is one of those people that has a maid service yet she doesn’t work and doesn’t do much of anything else other than shop. She also cleans before the maid gets there. Very strange I know. Luckily she lives 3 hours away of she would be appalled at the way my house normally looks. I am very happy that I get plenty of advance notice before they ever come for a visit!
Ivy says
I am EXACTLY the same. My mom is like your mom and would have told me the same thing too and HAS said similar.
It’s nice to hear that WE are normal in our own little way.
I’m gonna share your story sweet lady. I couldn’t have said this better.
Cheers~Ivy
Lorna says
Good luck with your challenge! I spent last week going through the house, admited having piles and sorted them out.
There is a couch in our home office I’d forgotten was there!
Your Mom sounds like she knows what’s important, and so do you!
Lorna
Your Southern Peach says
What a lovely post. Your mom sounds amazing! I like setting my kitchen timer for 15 minute intervals throughout the day for “speed cleaning” sessions. I challenge myself to see how much I can do before my time is up. Very pretty photo of you by the way.
Shell says
Your mama is a smart woman.
seasweetie says
How wonderful! I am just like you – hate to clean but love a clean house (and can’t afford a maid). Your Mom’s words sound exactly like something my Mom would have said – they made me smile, but they made me miss her. Can I borrow your Mom for an hour?
TornadoTwos says
Awww, what a nice post about your mom! A clean home makes me feel calm, a messy home stresses me out. And yet, my home is a mess. Not unhealthy gross, but I’d definately be embarrassed if someone stopped by unannounced. My mom was definately a cleaner, people STILL say stuff about how clean my mom kept/keeps her home and how I must be just like her. I use the “I have 5 kids and she only had 3” excuse to justify it to myself, but the truth is I sometimes have the chances to clean and I just don’t feel like it.
Kristi {at} Live and Love Out Loud says
You know, the more and more you write about your mom the more and more I want to be her kid. She’s so wise and so sweet. As far as cleaning goes, I used to be meticulous. Everything had to be just so. Then my fourth kid came along. It’s all gone to hell now. Don’t feel bad. I’m right there with you, Kat. If the cleaning fairy ever shows up at my house, I’ll send her to yours right after!
Jenn says
I’m horrible at cleaning. My house is roughly a 5 or 6 on average. I have armed myself with every tool imaginable but can’t bring myself to actually keep up on it. I will clean and have everything spotless for a month then I get sick of being the only one cleaning so I let it go a bit and things get clutter to where I can’t stand it then I clean again. Ugh..
Suz says
No comment. Because my house resembles the above post. :/
JustMom420zaks says
I’m dubious. Every time I see pics of your house, it looks like a photo from Better Homes and Gardens, with some toys thrown around for realism.
My mom is super clean too, but she doesn’t see my blogging as a fair trade off… your mom still wins.
Lynn MacDonald (All Fooked Up) says
ahhh…what’s the point of cleaning…it just gets dirty again. I have someone else come in and clean. And then, i have someone come in and make it dirty again. Therefore, it’s not my problem and i don’t make the mess OR clean it up. But i’m right here commenting…so, that should count for something, right?
Mary Hudak-Collins says
Aren’t moms great that way??? I’m like you, don’t really care to spend that extra time it takes to really tidy up the house. Why, it just gets dirty again? I do pick up, but just can’t get motivated to really give it a good cleaning. Maybe once the weather breaks, and the birds start chirping, I’ll do a good spring cleaning!
Nice post and a wonderful read;)
Lisa says
My mom had seven children, had a spotless house and dinner on the table every single night. I have two kids and my house get cleaned on the weekends…if we have nothing else going on…maybe…..and let’s not even talk about cooking.
Linds says
couldn’t have said it better myself.
Marge says
OMGoodness, what a lovely post! Such a wise Mom… I am sure you have inherited more that you know from her.
Make it a great day!
Kelly Deneen says
I love this post. :) I love a clean house too, but I am not a fan of actually cleaning it. The only thing I will do is to make sure the main floor (living room, kitchen, and dining room) is picked up every night before I go to bed. All toys are put away, all throw blankets folded, all pillows fluffed, etc. I just do the actual cleaning (vacuuming, dusting, etc.) on the weekend. It helps keep me sane.
And your mom is awesome. You are too though!
Jennifer says
My mom just walks into my house and shakes her head. Sometimes I ask her how she did it and she responds, “I didn’t work.” You have a job and a happy family. Cut yourself some slack… and I’ll promise to do the same.
(By the way, I say I’m about a four or a five so I either judge more harshly than you or your house is cleaner than mine. Pick which ever makes you happier.)
Andrea says
Aww, can I borrow your mom please? I need a little of that! And before tackling your upstairs, check out the flylady.com. She basically writes a boot camp for cleaning. Great motivation to get started.
I Thought I Knew Mama says
I can sooo relate! I love a clean house, but can’t seem to balance baby and cleaning… although, of course, I did quickly figure out how to blog and take care of baby ;-)
Dominique @Dominique's Desk says
I hate cleaning too.. however with little kids it is important to keep the house clean..especially the floors. I try to do cleaning in 5-10 min each time.
camesha says
I love it!!!!!!!!! I am so there. I keep telling my husband we need a maid. There’s just not enough time in the day to clean the whole house and by the time I’m done with one room at a time it’s time to start the process over again! HMPH!
Shreta says
I wish I could afford a maid! I love a clean house, my house is not extremely dirty but I would definitely like it to be much more cleaner. I always told my husband that as soon as we can afford it I would hire a maid to clean once a week just to keep everything organize and neat. By the way, your mom sounds great! :-)
Shreta says
Oops, I forgot to mention I’m visiting you from Blog Frog and I just subscribed to your blog. :-)
iphonemom.blogspot.com
Dawn's Diversions says
I all kinds of love this post. I feel the very same way. My mom is a clean freak. I know how to clean and clean well, but I lack motivation to KEEP it clean. I know I’m doing my girls a disservice by not being a better example though.
What a beautiful mother you have and what a blessing she is to you to fill your soul with such acceptance.
Dolli-Mama says
I am the same way, I love a clean house but I can’t stand the cleaning!
Crystal says
You always crack me up! I like a clean house too, but omgosh people keep messing it up!!! I used to have an in-home daycare so I know EXACTLY what you are saying…they suck your energy! I looked into a cleaning lady…yeah, turns out they are spendy! SO it looks like I’m the cleaning lady…only working for free…and for sexual favors but that seems like it’s another topic all together!!!!!
jackie says
Ugh, I hate cleaning too! I get most of it done on the weekend, but during the week, this place is an absolute mess. There’s just not enough time!!
Ginna says
I hate cleaning but love a clean house! My husband does most of the cleaning but I don’t like the way he cleans. I have never seen a person use soooooo much paper towel to clean the floors or bathroom. But I guess I shouldn’t complain since he is does it. My mom is like your mom. She took care of 4 kids, worked full time and managed to keep the house spotless. She is pretty bad though…she now has a maid in her vacation house and she is teaching the maid how to really clean (down on your knees with a toothbrush clean!!!). Love your blog!!!
Vicarious Chelsea says
I’m with you! Every couple of weeks (ahem, months), I really, really clean my house. Every single time I tell myself that it’s not that hard to keep it clean. I make promises, like one load of laundry a night. One room per night (really, I don’t have that many rooms). Or an ice cream if the house stays clean for a week.
I totally keep my promises. Except that the first couple of days, the house is so clean that I don’t need to follow through. And then… promises? huh? What promises? (Oh, but I do still eat the ice cream. duh)
But that’s it. Starting now, I’m with you. 30 minutes of cleaning a ni… hahaha I almost said it with a straight face!
Courtney says
Hah, I love a clean house, too, but it only happens when we have company coming over. It’s the only way I’m motivated to really get it done. I also adore cleaning products. Target’s aisle of cleaning supplies is heavenly, but I never seem to use the things I get as much as I’d hoped to.
Merrie says
It has been so long since I read your blog that I didn’t even know you’d made all these changes. Should I be telling you that? ACK! I’m back from my self-imposed break from the blog world, and I LOVE what you’ve done.
As for this post — love love your love for you mom, and I feel inspired to do something nice for mine, now. :)
carina says
I am so not a cleaner, though I DO love when it’s really, really clean. My mother-in-law is the QUEEN of clean, so I am usually mortified when she comes over.
Beautiful tribute to your mother, by the way! :) Very inspiring lady.
Paula/adhocmom says
I know what you mean. My toddler destroys my apartment EVERY frickin’ day. So I think of it as “resetting” my apartment. I don’t totally clean it, because that takes forever. I just reset it to a reasonable level to where it doesn’t drive me crazy and my husband and I don’t have to stare at toddler crap post-bedtime.
marie says
I am with you, with you with you. My sister in law says, “so long as the public parts of the house are clean, you’ve done your job. Actually, she is waaaay messier than me… like gross messy… but that’s another story. Please read my piost about housecleaning here, bc I think we’re on the same page!!
(it’s not dirty, it’s just lived in!!) “http://35daysamonth.blogspot.com/2011/02/its-not-dirty-its-just-lived-in.html
Jenny says
I have so much guilt over this and yet I still decided to start a blog. No time for laundry but time for a blog? Yes, that’s right! And it’s because your momma is exactly right. I am creative, I NEED to write for sanity. God bless her!!