1.) A promise.
When I said my vows I made a promise to never leave my husband…and I MEANT it…conditionally. On condition that he doesn’t turn into a serial killer, he doesn’t beat me and the children, he doesn’t cheat on my with a prettier woman etc… I said my vows, but it was a promise we all know we can get out of right?
Every once in awhile I give my husband a hard time, “GAH, I asked for a 30 ounce bag of frozen hash browns, but I wanted shredded…you bought diced? Seriously what were you thinking, we’ve been through this a thousand times!?!”
Maile has gotten very sensitive to what I think is ‘comical’ arguing. I don’t REALLY hate Pat for buying the wrong hash browns…even though I really am a teensy bit annoyed.
So now when the comical arguing starts Maile says things like “are you guys fighting?” and “I don’t like it when you do that…”.
The other night I was all “Maile why does that bother you? We’re just teasing!” and she was all “because I think you might break up” and then I got all sentimental with her and was all “Maile, sometimes when you live with someone they drive you bat shit crazy…just like how Laina and Kainoa make you want to scream and hit them sometimes…but that doesn’t mean you’ll break up sweetheart! It just means they happen to be driving you bat shit crazy…”
And then I said, “Your Father and I vowed to stay married forever and we meant it darling!”
(You know, unlike everyone else??)
And she was all, and I quote “Well some people break those promises”.
And here’s where I think I messed up…instead of saying, “Maile I understand my arguing with your Dad bothers you and I’m going to change my behavior by working really hard not to do that in front of you anymore…”
You know, INSTEAD of being the adult and working to keep my sensitive child at peace with herself, I chose to make a promise,
“Maile, Look at my eyes and listen to my words very carefully…I will never ever EVER break up with your Dad. NEVER. Do you understand?”
She nodded gratefully, but with every “ever” my inner voice was screaming “My God what kind of promise are you MAKING!?!” This felt even more serious than my vows because I know that breaking THIS promise could land my daughter in therapy and might cause her to hate me.
I poured myself a glass of wine.
Okay four glasses of wine.
I don’t have any plans to leave her father, but my promise has given me hives.
He better not screw this up.
Now it’s your turn!
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1.) A promise.
2.) I thought my child was going to _______, but instead he/she _______.
3.) Tell us something you learned about a grandparent that surprised you.
4.) List 7 things your pet thought about today.
5.) Spring fashion is in the air! Put together and share an Spring outfit you’d like someone with money to buy you.