11 Years Married To The Wrong Man

On November 20th I was all, “Oh God, is it our anniversary??” I looked at the calendar and was relieved to see I had 10 more days.

I would NOT forget this year.

Why do we need to remind ourselves how long we’ve been married every year? Why is this such a huge milestone in life that needs it own day of remembrance?

Regardless. People say it matters so I must remember!

November 26th came and I was all, “Oh God, is it our anniversary??” I looked at the calendar and was relieved to see I had 4 more days.

The amount of stress this day brings me every year just HOPING I don’t forget is reason alone to make me regret ever getting married in the first place.

On Saturday morning Pat left to get coffee while I sat in Laina’s room helping her clean.

The only reason she was cleaning it in the first place is because on Friday Maile promised to give her a Rainbow Loom bracelet and one of her binders if in exchange for those things Laina would agree to clean her own room. Not Maile’s room mind you. Maile made Laina agree to clean her own room.

What kind of big sister makes a deal like that?

When they were fighting on Saturday and Maile kept saying, “that was the deal…you’re breaking the deal!” I had to intervene “let me get this straight…Maile? You want Laina to clean her own room?? And Laina you accepted a bracelet and binder and agreed to clean it today?”  They both nodded and I had no choice but to be all, “Well Laina…then you have to clean your room today.” Laina started to cry and I was all, “Why don’t you just give the bracelet and binder back?” and Laina was all, “Noooo!” and I was all, “well then…get up there and get cleaning, that was the agreement!”

It felt really weird to force Laina to clean her room because Maile made her promise to do it, but a deal is a deal!”

So I sat there helping my little pack rat dig garbage out from under her bed when Pat walked into the room and was all, “what’s going on in here?” and I was all, “we’re cleaning Laina’s room because she promised Maile she would.” and Pat was all, “huh?” and I was all, “I know.”

And then he handed me a Pumpkin Spiced Latte and was all, “Well Happy Anniversary honey!”


I never would have remembered.

So there I sat, organizing toy bins for Maile in Laina’s room, sipping on a Pumpkin Spiced Latte, and celebrating 11 years married to the wrong man.

Happy Anniversary dear.



  1. says

    Hey – we all need one to remember the latte and another one to clean out the bins. It works…and probably means you’re married to {yes} the right guy!!

  2. says

    My husband never forgets our anniversary but he has stopped expecting gifts from me, who hates celebrations. I slipped a card in his work bag on our anniversary this year and yesterday he said “thanks for the card.”

    Our anniversary was three weeks ago.