Sometimes I’m convinced that even though I LOOK like I’m a grown up, I’m just as weird and awkward as I ever was as teen. When does the wise kick in? When can I stop faking self assuredness and confidence and actually become it?
I made inquiries for two doctor appointments for Maile the other day and it needed to be a same day appointment because she misses so much school and I wanted her to get looked at right away.
The first office said they’d see what they could do and would call me later that day.
The second office said they could get her in that morning and I told them I went ahead and booked the appointment.
The first office called back and was all “we can get her in today!”
And I was all, “ohhhh…actually, I just went ahead and sent her to school after all so I don’t need the appointment.”
And the nurse was all, “Oh really? But didn’t you say she has been dizzy for four days?”
“And that she was dizzy today as well?”
“And that she was lethargic and has not been eating?”
“Mmhmm that’s right.”
“Didn’t you also say you had been holding vigil at her bedside, reciting the Lord’s prayer with your grade school rosary?”
“Yes that was me.”
“But you still sent her to school?”
“Yes…I thought…maybe…being around her friends and getting some fresh air might be just what she needed. So, I’ll wait to see how she’s doing when she gets home!”
“Would you like to go ahead and schedule something for tomorrow just in case?”
She was so confused. How does a mother call in asking for a same day appointment suddenly decide her dizzy daughter might be fine to go to school after all.
I was confused too…when did they start asking so many questions?
Wouldn’t it have been easier to say, “I wasn’t sure if you were going to be able to get me in so I went ahead and got her in with another doctor.”
What really could they do? Could they blame me for looking beyond them when my child was in need of medical attention? But no, I had to get all weird about not wanting them to think I’m cheating on them with another doctor when the fact of the matter is I AM leaving them for another doctor and was just going to use them one more time in the interim. THAT’S THE TRUTH!
Isn’t the truth so much easier? DOESN’T IT SET US FREE?
Why do I insist on being a liar?