She waved the training bra in the air and I felt my face turn 50 shades of red. I mean, she was right…it WAS time. I had been stealing my sister’s bras for months and I definitely needed my own. I just didn’t think it would happen like that. My mother waving my first bra back and forth at me in the intimate apparel section of a department store. I guess I was just hoping to open my dresser drawer one day to find she had quietly slipped a few in there, but that wasn’t the case. Of course not. That would have been too easy.
And of course she bought me only one with no real instructions on how exactly to care for it. How often are you supposed wash one of these things? Shouldn’t I have at least two? Quite frankly I couldn’t afford to wash it because I needed to wear it everyday. When you go to a Catholic school in seventh grade and your daily uniform consists of a plaid skirt and a thin white turtle neck, it becomes very clear which girls definitely need to be wearing bras and which girls don’t. Or was I the only pervert who noticed those things?
The tag said to wash it by hand. I suppose I could have locked myself into the bathroom to scrub my bra by myself like all of the other 13 year olds were surely doing, but wouldn’t it be wet the next day? Could I throw it in the wash? Do I wash my one bra every single day? What was the protocol here!?!
Apparently my mother thought that pretty little training bra she waved at me was going to last me FOREVER, because nothing ever followed. I had no choice but to continue stealing my older sisters bras.
It wasn’t until my junior year in high school that one of my best friends slept over and when it was time to get ready for bed I left my bra on. She was all, “do you SLEEP in that?” and I was all, “well DUH…of course I do!” and she was all, “like every night or just because I’m here?” and I was all, “we’re not supposed to sleep in them every night???”
I had been wearing it to bed for YEARS.
My brain missed that chip where it just tells you how to take care of yourself properly. When I confronted my Mom with news of my “monthly cycle” one of her replies was, “Well Kathy, you might find you’re yourself wanting to take showers more often and maybe everyday instead of quarterly…” and I was all, “Showers?? No. Not really feeling like that.”
Out of the four of us girls, I was the only one to confront Mom with news of my monthly cycle. “You TOLD her??” My sisters were all quite amused with the fact that I actually instigated that conversation with our modest mother. We were ALL modest. No one wanted to be talking about things like bras and p-e-r-i-o-d-s.
I defended myself, “I thought I was SUPPOSED to, what with all the bra waving she did, I thought she wanted to know!” And my sisters were all, “What bra waving!?! Mom didn’t wave bras at us!”
So I’m the only one who gets to live with that lovely memory.
Now it’s your turn!
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1.) List 6 random facts about you and your husband. (example here)
2.) Show us what June looks like in your neck of the woods.
3.) Write a post inspired by the word: bra
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