I’m an inconsistent wife and mother. I get it.
About once a month I “turn over a new leaf” and decide I’m going to organize all the closets or I’m going to exercise or I’m going to wash clothes again, etc…
I’ll stick to my new leaf for awhile, but like all leaves, my new ones usually turn brown and die before floating gracefully to the ground. I get distracted by other goals and kids and fun projects and no longer have the time or desire to maintain what I set out to maintain.
When my husband came home from Cross Fit the other day telling me he was going to participate in a challenge, but had to think up a goal, I was all, “Cool! That’s great!”
And when he was all, “but I can’t really think of anything because I’ve already reached a healthy weight, I have large and tone muscles, and I’m all around really healthy and amazing!” (I’m ad libbing here folks)
And I was all, “Yes, that’s true honey!”
And then a day later he was all, “I think I know what my goal needs to be!”
And I was all, “Oh I can’t wait to hear more!”
And he was all, “I just really need to get consistent with my meals and maybe meal plan every week so that I have healthy things to eat at all times.”
And I was all, “Oh….”
And he was all, “Wouldn’t it be great to have a personal chef? That’s the dream right there.”
And I was all, “ahem. I suppose.”
And he was all, “And I need to eat as clean as possible. High protein, clean meals every night.”
And I was all, “You know Pat? This challenge of yours is starting to sound an awful lot like a challenge for ME. I mean…personal chef? Isn’t that basically what I am for this whole family?”
And he was all, “well I don’t know…you didn’t cook anything tonight.” (Hold my earrings).
And I was all, “I mean, your goal to eat healthy meals consistently…we both know you’re not going to cook. It takes you three times as long to prep a meal as it does a normal human.”
And he was all, “Yeah I know!”
And I was all, “So if you want to succeed at your personal challenge it means you need ME to get more consistent with, not only planning your meals but planning clean eating, high protein meals, every night. This sounds like the worst challenge ever.”
And he smiled and was all, “thank you honey!”
And I was all, “A challenge is supposed to be something that is personally difficult for you to change. It’s supposed to make you a little uncomfortable. You’re supposed to feel like you accomplished something.”
He nodded emphatically agreeing.
And I was all, “personally I’d love to see you give up your daily coffee drink. It’s not clean or healthy and it’s expensive.”
….I don’t think Pat’s participating in The Challenge anymore.